Fiction based around Glasgow. My personal journal and views on inspiration

  i understand that life gets bland like tea without the milk in, i understand that life gets dark like when you put the blinds down. i understand that adult life is very very tricky i understand that responsibility makes you want to go loopy. i understand that your Dyane my sister who i hold dear, i love you very very much my life is ok you don't have to fear, i understand that you worry but just know things will be good. i understand that  sometimes we get sad i understand your happy though I'm very glad of that. i'm glad my only wish came true i used my wish to wish for you for happiness and love and wealth i also wished for you to have good health, i understand my wish came true always know i love you ..

  When time runs out, when your time is up what do you think happens. I have recently started to deal with the fact that death is an inevitability. I amongst others I imagine have a fear of dying. Some people have witnessed death may seem less afraid, but I know that this is just for show at least in my experience. Those that seem harder skinned are usually just as afraid and deserve to be treated just like anyone else wen the end is near.             That’s where I come in. The door for me to help those in need seems like it should be closed with a big no entry sign above. I do not say this to be cruel or even as a self-doubt. I will explain.               As a child I always had a date in my head. The date is 10/06/2024 this will be my 35 th birthday. I tell you this because I saw this date appear on a wall as I passed by on the bus one day when I was young, l...

                                                                             my dream                     well better late than never I say.  my dream last night made me think of very odd situations when i woke up. not real situations but the emotion you feel whilst dreaming lingers softly for a few hours just as you wake up. i dreamt of my mum, sisters and stepdad of my mum's previous relationship. so that was fucking weird to say the least.     i was in my old bedroom i mean 17 years ago ve had so many flats since then, my partner jamie was next to me and he told me the only thing i do is bone and the moan. funny stuff i know and then my mum shouted i hear...

My father was never in my life, not that I can remember. One situation I recall is when I was around 5 or 6, my father has been unfaithful to my mum to the point he fathered a child with another woman his name was john we attended nursery school together. I don’t have many memories and it was not until I was older, I found out I had a brother. John was conceived the night my mum was in giving birth to me, that’s right a class act father all the way. One cold and haunting night something very tragic happened. John fell in the park from a high jungle gym type attraction that climbed to the sky. He seemed okay and the night went on to John and his mum gong to the chippy (chip shop). Whilst waiting on his food he slipped on a wet floor and banged his head for a second time in 2 hours. His mum seemed to think he would be alright and continued on with the night john had a best friend called lee whom I know very well. Lee stayed over that night in johns house and lay with him on the couch one...

  I can’t explain the joy you feel when this sort of good news is given. I spent the day feeling stressed, worried, anxious and all together lacklustre and lethargic. It was quite terrifying to say the least but when good news was given, I was over the moon. My mother was taken to hospital as they suspected she may have contracted breast cancer. After some time and a lot of testing the found her to be in good health with no complications. I'm not embarrassed to say I cried because I was so happy. Now for anyone going through this I want you to stay strong and if you ever need to chat do you know where to find me. her words to me where " I'm not going anywhere soon" i dont think ive ever been so happy but also scared simultaneously as one feeling leaves your mind another pushes its was in and all you can do is cry.   

I find myself having irregular Dreams at night, my partner Jamie Thinks these dreams are a bit insane. he finds it odd that i can control my dreams and what happens in them. I had a dream the other night about a war torn country that we seemed to live in. I was on Top of a plane as it Landed in Celebration of some kind of Victory. The plane landed and i got off to a round of cheers by people all wearing the same thing it seemed to be army issued clothing all green and dark with white hats and white stripes. Everyone that passed each other thereafter where presenting the peace symbol to each other. Another Dream i had was That zombies where chasing me , I ran with Jamie and was hiding within the old tenement flats in easterhouse and where hiding there seemed to be zombies and a group of men chasing us all dressed in suits We hid behind a massive photo that had a space between it . I was soon caught and was telling Jamie to run as i witnessed my insides being pulled out and eaten ali...

Control of the airports was surrendered to the union. The trains had been stopped boarded and used for shelter by those travelling around the land to find food and energy . The citizens’ fought  themselves. The big Business’s had all fallen and money has became useless.   No one was getting out of Britain. This was it, the beginning of the end. The sun didn't seem to shine so bright but burn with a dark yellow creating day glow that seemed only fitting for the end of days. The union had taken over most of London and was fighting its way north collecting more and more vulnerable people as they traveled, recruiting the easily led and narrow minded. The union consisted of The Master, and Heads Of Region. For each area of the country they name their own one person who has shown loyalty becomes Head Of Region. The union believed in old time laws such as capital punishment for even the smallest crimes. People in the Old country of Scotland now known simply as The North started to...

Life is lived fast in these parts. Just another rushed day with a fast pace and a negative tone.  Yet another motive in someone's propagandistic mind.  Haunted by routine and prediction through the repetition of actions.  Jealous of the bohemian, devoted to work.  A sheep in a crowd of suits fake smiles and contracts  Afraid to take chances and  is led through life by telephone calls. A mind littered with useless information, imperfections and unsocial obligation. Trapped in this glass cell of business, then nothing but on-line shopping. Graced by praise and inflicted through change. A time keeping, never dating constant burden on the nation. I put it to you his life is wasted.  

Picture this if you will, The sun going down over a majestic hill. Falling to the sea as darkness floods in. Clouds separating. The dark blue of and slightly golden twinkle of the night sky gracing the cliff. The only light being the moon to guide you to the edge. You stand and look at your world in front of you. Everything you have achieved and everything you want to achieve. The calming rush of the ocean capturing your senses. Seemingly quiet turns to natures sounds. Behind you is your home. A small but loved stone house. The walls keep in everything you don't want to escape. But you can Leave whenever you want. To find freedom. To clear your head. To live. The sight of trees for miles around. A forest path taken before, Never been seen through these eyes. You take a step back. Find your breath. You cry. You scream. It echos through the trees and the waves. It's a siren of anger. A lonely war siren Only You and nature can hear. If some one was to ...

          Initially There was two. Toni and Dyane. They are great in their own way and even though the small things matter so much more with sisters it is just the way it's always been. arguments over the toilet and even at one point who had more coco pops in a bowl.             I have came to learn that they have shaped who I am. To be honest they would reply with "don't blame that on us" but yet show nothing but encouragement with everything i do that's good. recently I've been blessed with a girl called Krisztina, who is engaged, to Toni. Instantly becoming part of the family. So two sisters turn to three. I would have loved to grow  up knowing my brother but god had different plans, but life goes on in a family and you cant dwell on things. I'm just really grateful that have my girls. When you see someone growing up from a baby and have memories of them, you holding them in your arm...

Through out my written work i have picked out some really inspirational quotes that at this time in my life leave me both Joyful and sad. Sad because many people don't live by these words and they are so simple, Happy because no matter what happens there is always at least one person Listening . inspirational quotes from my written work that i had put on two plaques in my room and my friends and family signed, they read, "Be strong, Smile, Speak out, Help those who cant help themselves, Find your potential, Turn negativity into a positiveness, Reach new heights, No matter what happens don't dwell on the past, The pen is most defiantly, mightier than the sword, Life is a show and we all p lay our parts and as the curtains close you take and bow.. life well played no matter who you are, Always carry a penny in your pocket therefor you will never be without money, Happiness is not something you find it's something you make, Dont take the power of the universe for grant...

Last nights dream, really odd. Whilst sleeping, I had a dream that i was in an old castle or manor house. Most of the house was unexplored and everyone seemed quite weary of this place but not me. I was Living in this house with 4 or five others and i was a considerable bit older than i am now. I explored some of the house and found an old built in Hallway through a set of double doors resembling that of an old hospital . The hallway was full of old musical instruments, a guitar that was broken a piece from a drum kit. I found this rather odd as i rummaged more through the unexpected find. It was quite dark in the Hallway and the atmosphere was getting intense and just for a moment i saw what looked like Shining green light appear at the bottom almost like eyes, Then a force of some kind stooped me from getting back out the hallway it was almost like the floor turned to ice and i couldn't move forward , sliding in panic ...

Opinions please.. The ParaLands. Written in the style of a documentary news article. You open your eyes and look around you, green trees slowly changing shades as it gets colder and the days seem shorter. In time this becomes part of routine this is what you expect. Every winter the same every summer similar. You open your eyes in the morning and close them again at night. Its snowing over the hills of Lake Keel, it's the 31st of January 2016. Sudden developments in the field of black hole research have came to a point were it may be possible to transport to and from other dimensions within the great darkness that is space. For years I have wondered about the possibility of parallel worlds and believe that there is a world like our very own with some unexplained differences. This world may be more scientifically advanced but if that was the case why had contact not been made before. This world could have been founded on religion and belief there for having no scientific ...

I have recently came to learn that the people who influence you the most are not the people who will pick up the pieces when shit hits the fan. You have your group of friends and they try very hard to make you feel better but its that routine that made you feel like this in the first place. You meet people who have a massive impact in your life and then 'boom' you never see them again. Like relationships friends work the same way. Apart from the obvious the feeling you have for friends are similar. This can leave anyone feeling hurt, disappointed, embarrassed and even questioning yourself. But in more than one occasion it's not you. People think differently. I wear my heart on my sleeve and when i let someone into my life it means a lot more to me than it ever has does to any one else, five people being an exception. A,A,R,R & P. These people know who they are an have had my best interests at heart for a long while. This is a short blog entry, the poi...

Perfect and normal are just words set by society either to give people an aim in life, a goal to reach and a positive way of thinking. These words can be dangerous though. Perfect does not exist neither does normal. These words can cause people to question their own lives. These words are a gateway for judgmental people to say that they are better than everyone else and cause people to question there own uniqueness. This can cause harm and negativity. This can cause people to not see there full potential and feel like they have to live up to some kind of barrier, a barrier set by those who are weak and only thrive on other people failures such as image, lifestyle, hobbies and education. If you don't get a good start in life you will, without thinking, fall victim to this. I know I have. I have noticed certain types of people who can't see by this. They say "the pen is mightier than the sword" and its true in so many ways. So if at any point you think that you don...

2006-06-21 12:39  ( this was written when i was 16, many things have changed but i just wanted people to know that i could still wright very well when i was younger. ) Julie, So today’s a new day I can’t wait to tell of what happened in the last few weeks. Well firstly there was Julie she is a self confessed lesbian and uses people for money for e.g. Greame Jones her ex boyfriend and now apparent friend. Greame has lots of money and Julie hangs out with him because of this. You may think that I’m sad for talking about her like this but I make a valid point. Well as time went on julie and Greame friendship grows stronger due to recent events I saw a side of Lauren I didn’t see before a horrible two faced side but Greame  is yet to see this but will be shocked when he does. Recently when I was still friends with them both I lost my job and didn’t have much money because I wasn’t buying Julie much anymore she turns to Greame and asks ...

Date: 2006-05-09 12:59 Subject: My new profile Security: Public HI everyone my first live journal entry im growing up fast. any way I was almost killed by lightining. my ex g.f now best friend is a bean and im just lovin it lol so how is every one leave a comment haha, madness  

Date: 2006-05-10 09:46 Subject: hey peeps Security: Public Mood: accomplished hows it going im in college its the last day of english and im bored i handed in all my work well all exept the stuff i have to hand in by friday. im supposed to be doing acting next year but iv been put on a waiying list so ill see ho thst goes... random family guy quote of the day Stewie: "How you uh, how you comin' on that novel you're working on? Huh? Gotta a big, uh, big stack of papers there? Gotta, gotta nice litte story you're working on there? Your big novel you've been working on for 3 years? Huh? Gotta, gotta compelling protaganist? Yeah? Gotta obstacle for him to overcome? Huh? Gotta story brewing there? Working on, working on that for quite some time? Huh? (voice getting higher pitched) Yea, talking about that 3 years ago. Been working on that the whole time? Nice little narrative? Beginning, middle, and end? Some friends become enemies, some enem...